How great would it be for me to die right now?
written at 1:45 pm on Tuesday, Jul. 01, 2003

How great would it be for me to die right now? And why does that phrase always sneak into my mind whenever something bad happens? Whenever someone puts me down?

Well, stupid me screwed up yet again. God, I should just kill myself. Do everyone a favor. That Raven girl absolutely hates me! She says so in her dairy! And I think she speaks for everyone. That's it. I'm leaving the journaling world. Maybe even leaving my world. Why do I go on when everyone, including me, wishes I would die? And of course she's right. I should be dead. God, I can't tell you guys how close I am to killing myself. I'm just trying to think of one person who cares about me. One person who loves me. One person who can tolerate me. And I can think of no one.

Which is why I quit. I just quit. Not just journaling. But life. Tell me one reason, one, why anybody would care about a loser like me? They wouldn't. They don't. I don't.

Miss. Meggin

10 comments so far

back & forth